more flowers...

this morning we had to get up extra early to make it in time to get KFC's breakfast.  i've been so intrigued by their breakfast offering, which includes the normal breakfast sandwich kind of stuff and then also some chinese flair, like fried crueller dough thingy and congee!

again, my fascination w/ baby buds

  we hit up the heze international peony exhibit.  despite not many people having heard of this town, something they are famous for are their peonies.  apparently the beautiful peonies we saw in luoyang originated from heze... but due to poor marketing and lack of business saavy, it seems that luoyang beat heze to the floral tourism competition, if it can be called that.

   

meanings completely change with
omission of 1 simple letter... "Lotus Poo"  

my new look

while the floral park was really nice, most of the flowers had already wilted and in peony heaven.  nonetheless, we had a good time just wandering around the gardens and such.

"protecting your circumstances
begins with me" so throw
your  trash where it belongs.

a new type of tree... trash tree

Later this afternoon we headed over to see the local church building that my parents attend. It’s in the old part of town that reminds you of what old China would look. A poor area. I wish I was going to be around on a Sunday so I can attend service with them… I guess that will have to wait till next time.

Afterwards we headed to this open park area where a stadium and concerthall are. Not really sure what happens in them or how often there are performances, given that this is such a small city, but it’s a nice open area where you’ll see families exercising, sitting and hanging out with their kids, flying kites, rollerblading, etc.


I’m no good at sitting still so I brought along this Chinese hackysack with feathers that Chinese people play with. I need some more practice with that… it’s quite different from juggling a soccer ball, but that’s my main frame of reference.

chillin in the park

struggling with the chinese hackysack

Then…we got all excited because we saw a greyhound there! Despite my parents not wanting another dog, I could tell that inside, they were connected to this little greyhound… I could tell they were thinking about my goldie. I wish they would adopt another… I so wish… it was sad though because later on, 2 german shepherds went over ot pick on the greyhound and fight with the skinny little guy. I felt so bad for the little guy… I could tell my parents were stunned by it. The poor thing… I just wanted to run over and hug the greyhound, but the owner had warned us not to when we initially approached the owner and asked permission to pet it…

don't litter!

let's face it.  lots of people here in my parents little but large town toss their trash whereever.  granted, these litterbugs are creating much needed jobs for these old men and women hired to pick up trash everywhere... but still... let's take some responsibility for our earth.

BUT...
this morning, as we were headed out of my parents apartment, we walked by a mother and her elementary school aged daughter.  The daughter was about to drop her juice carton on the ground when her mother harshly scolded her and said in Chinese: "you forgot again!  you cannot throw things on the ground like that."  I was so proud of the mother!  Now that's parenting...thank you.

Later in the evening, my dad and I were walking back to the apartment.  In the complex, as an SUV drove by us, a lady rolled down her window and dropped her food wrapper out the window.  As she was rolling up her window, my dad nicely says in a tone as if she had dropped something personal of hers that was very important, "oh, you dropped your... trash."  I could tell she hesitated at first before my dad said the word "trash", wondering what she had dropped.  She rolled up her window and the suv continued to drive away.  Anyways, hopefully she took some of my dad's comment in although she seemed a bit peeved.  I was proud of my dad and found quite a bit of humor in just hearing my dad's tone towards her.

thinking about...

the royal wedding.  where was i?  i had just jumped out of the shower after finally hitting up the gym, to find that the wedding was not being broadcast on any ch tv station.  they were only capturing snippets here and there... so i scrambled online to livestream from abc to cnn to bbc... a mess of a time.  i thought we were going to have dinner watching live stream of the wedding on my computer, but i grew so frustrated with sites dropping, blocked, and plain old slow... very slow... constantly dropping.  so, gave up and watched some snippets on tv and internet later this evening.

thoughts and prayers...
Alishan train accident in taiwan that killed 5 mainlanders and injured slews of others.  on the news here quite a bit.  sad to see the families of those who lost lives... to think they went out on vacation, having a grand ole time, to end in tragedy.

Tornadoes back in the states.  there's not as much press coverage on this here but can't believe what's going on back at home.

home sweet home... in china.

french fry box at dico's reads:
"every min 100 acres of rainforest
disappears from our world.  if each
person saved 1 sheet of paper
(size 16? my guess is 10x16),
we could save 284.4 tons of forest."

I finally made it to my parents place in middle of nowhere China! A small town that many legit Chinese people from China have never heard of… yet despite that, there are over 8 million people who reside in this “small” city. If anyone’s been to China, you’ll know that there are plenty of McD’s and KFCs and some Pizza Huts. There is not even a McDs or Pizza Hut in this small town – only a couple of KFCs and a local KFC like place called Dicos – so that tells you something about the size and development of this town.


Despite that, it feels like home even though it is not Philly nor even the country I was born and raised. There’s something about being with family that creates that comfortable home-like atmosphere. Or perhaps it’s simply that I have a bedroom here to myself and I feel the freedom to throw my stuff anywhere I want, or at least wherever in the bedroom. My parents are pretty used to my messiness, and I’m quite used to (putting aside) their comments about me cleaning up. My excuse is that it’s hard to live out of a backpack for so long… excuses I aside, I admit I can be quite messy at times. And it's been so nice to just sleep in and veg...

parents pad in china

river and walkway next to their apt

As I write this morning, I’m sitting in their apartment on my parents yang tai, sun room/indoor balcony like structure that the localers use to hang their wet laundry. My parents also use it for that purpose, but also just to sit, relax, soak in some vitamin D, read, work, or whatever. Legit Chinese people don’t like the sun so I assume we are probably the only family here that uses this for that purpose. Nonetheless, I am enjoying this wonderful morning sitting out here, having a little qt, listening to my itunes, sipping some Nescafe coffee. My mom’s just joined me on the yang tai.. the two of us, with our coffee and laptops open. My mom playing mahjong tile matching game with others on the www, me just doing my usual.

My dad’s at work during the day, so my mom and I have been hanging, running errands, and stuff. We wandered over to the mall yesterday – pretty decent mall actually. I convinced my parents to get a router for their one internet line – things here work a bit differently such that you need to register the computer that will use the internet line, so it’s a pain, nearly impossible to switch computers – so having the router installed has been really great as many of you all know how much I like to stay connected. I feel like I finally have some time to catch up on some emails and do some things that I’ve really been needing to do, like prepare for a trip to India this summer to work with Emmanuel Ministries again. Emails and work that have been delayed… starting the catch-up.

Last night I saw an interesting article by one of my fav nyt reporters. Won’t post it here and now. Good article tho..and a good reminder of the need to remain careful with communications to/from this country.

Outside my parents apartment is a little exercise playground with all sorts of fun exercise machines that don’t do much of anything. Well, I guess it’s better than nothing, but my mom and I had a blast playing with those on our way out yesterday. Here are some pics.

the human hamster wheel

side swing

eliptical swing

upright rowing maching

English translation at its best - "Howdy..."

mom and I are staying at an airport hotel where we’ll be picked up at tomorrow to head to my parents place. I assume this airport hotel caters to business people, mostly local but I’m sure international too since it’s next to an international airport and there’s quite a bit of development going on in this town, but… they are definitely going to need to work on their English translation. In the “service directory” pamphlet in the room, there is a welcome letter that entertained mom and i with a good laugh. I took a photo of it but i can't upload photos through this poor connection... so... i'm just writing it out... because it is that good... well, at least we thought so.

Honorific guest:

Howdy!

I represent ZHENG ZHOU'S all employee of the hot springs hotel of the airport sincerely to your come to mean most earnestness of welcome!

Cabaret is from ZHENG ZHOU in Henan new international airport management limited company investment build of one three star Class cabarets of, locate at to wait the machine building west side at new international airport of ZHENG ZHOU, own the convenience, the fast boarding Service exclusively; The environment is beautiful, staying at this, can make you free of mind and happy of heart: The facilities is well-found, service enthusiasm, thoughtful: The hot springs shower of the cabaret can make you the fatigues of the busy cancellation travel; You can also taste the cabaret restaurant here the delicacy good dinners of various taste, such as yu, yue, chuan of a reason with m---- and xiang, Etc. Everything is here are all for you to prepare of.

The cabaret all the employees all wish to provide the service and help for you, from the bottom of the heart wishing to wish you to spend a fine time here!

flowers flowers everywhere!

Mom and I went to the white horse pagoda – another Buddhist temple. Nothing too exciting, but the fat, smiling Buddha statue welcoming us was quite cute. After lunch at KFC – yes we are truly an American family – we headed to one of the many peony gardens. The peonies in Luoyang are internationally renowned. Apparently they open in beginning of April, so we’re a little bit late in the season so some were already dying, but they were still beautiful and impressive.

field of baby buds... 

birth of a new life...

baby bud looking up to its
 mature beautiful sista

It was neat to see the flowers in different stages of life – some just a bud, some starting to bud, others as full bloomed flowers, and many others starting to wilt. It was the tiny buds that caught my eye the most… which I guess you might say is kind of strange since they’re not that beautiful compared to the bloomed flowers around them. But as I stared at the buds, I was so reminded of His work in our lives, in the lives of those around us. Physically, they may not be that pretty, actually quite ugly, but He perfects even the flowers, in their time, to slowly bloom into a beautiful creation in His perfect timing...His creation. It is His doing. Similarly in our own lives, we too were ugly, but it is He who makes us a new creation and blooms us into His precious, beautiful, and perfect child. Starting from seed that grows with strong roots into a bud that finally blooms into a beautiful creation. Even as the flower ages and wilts, it is still beautiful with its wrinkled petals. How beautiful is His creation, and to know that I am one of them brings a smile to my face... i'll back post some photos after i have a better connection!      

hiding in the flowers

As I write this, mom and I are on the bus headed back to Zhengzhou. We’ll stay there overnight and then my dad’s driver will pick us up tomorrow to head to Heze where my parents live. First priority – find the gym and work my heart out. I had to run (a few yards) to get something yesterday and it felt so good to jog, even if ever so slightly and slowly. I purposefully didn’t bring my running shoes because I knew if I did, I’d be tempted to go running or do something I shouldn’t on my bum ankle. In Beijing, I actually was tempted and bought a pair of fake nikes, thinking that I could maybe run in them and play soccer with the locals in them (there was a soccer field next to the place we were staying so I was ever so tempted), but after I got back to the apartment, I found that the sneakers won’t fit over my ankle brace. Bummer – He knows me too well… obviously… so we’ll see… it’s been resting for awhile now so I may give it a shot and go for a slow jog… I’m sure it won’t last long… not because of the ankle but because my lungs will probably hurt so bad from the pollution and just plain being out of shape! Dying to run around… or go for a nice spin…

East-r in Luoyang

I’m bummed that I didn’t make it to The House today to celebrate j’s res. Unfortunately, my mom and I were being picked-up early this morning to visit the Longmen Grottos and Songshan and Shaolin Temple. So, we celebrated our East-r morning visiting Buddhist statues and figures and relics buried in caves, still standing since the 5th century, riding a gondola and hiking around Songshan mountain, and watching some Shaolin kung-fu.

                              

Songshan Mtn.

Shaolin kung-fu practice

I don’t really appreciate these temples or statues, but I have to admit that the pure size and the artistic and architectural construction that has lasted so many years is quite impressive. But I find that in the end, nothing compares with the natural beauty of G's creation – the water and mountains and the sky that we saw from the gondola and short hike we took on Songshan mountain.

Shaolin kid in training

  

      

Shaolin kids in training

My mom and the taxi driver were talking about the socio-economic situation in ch, I filtered questions through my mom and stayed quiet to not give away that we were Americans. I may need to re-evaluate my opinions on ch’s gov that I wrote about in an earlier post, but I’ll save that for another time, perhaps after I’m back in the states. I’m going to try to do some more “user research”... find some random people to casually interview. The problem is my vocabulary is so limited when it comes to poltk and stuff… but I am curious… so, we’ll see.

As I was looking up things in Luoyang, I found an orphanage that was started by Steven Curtis Chapman and family a few years back. The orphanage, called Maria’s Big Hope, is for “special needs” children. I wanted to visit and see the work they are doing in China, but there’s not enough time, and I don’t think it’s quite my mom’s cup of tea. But this little orphanage caught my attention and I wanted to learn more about it and the Chapman family story as to what brought them to focus on orphans and Luoyang, China specifically.

The orphanage is named in memory of Chapman’s youngest daughter Maria, who suddenly passed away in 2008 in a tragic accident, just days after her 5th birthday. Steven and his wife adopted this little girl from China, who was considered a “special needs” child because she had a heart condition, which apparently turned out not to be a big deal after doctor’s checked her out in the states. A healthy, normal little girl who bright a smile and pure joy into their household.

I was touched by her story, by the heart and faith of the Chapman family, both before the accident and after and how they have continued her legacy by bringing hope to more children like Maria in China. On one site, they talked about how and why they decided to adopt. Steven likened it to our own adoption by our Father. We too were lost, wandereing, yet our Father came into our lives… here’s a short blurb from Chapman that really touched me. "Adoption is a physical picture of what J has done for me. I did nothing to deserve G's love; in fact, I was living as an orphan, without hope. Yet G chose to pursue a relationship with me, and through the death of his son J, I was adopted into G's family."

On this East-r Sunday, I am reminded of my own adoption into His family…how it was free for me, but it was tragic for Him – His own son had to pay for it all in a very painful way so that someone like me could be adopted into His family. It was He who initiated that relationship, to love us and care for us and welcome us with open arms. It was nothing we deserved and there’s no way we could ever pay Him back… but He doesn’t care. He loves us and gives it all to us, with open arms. He has risen. Thank you.

exploring luoyang

We finally arrived in Zhengzhou late last night and stayed up late at the hotel to unpack and repack a smaller suitcase for us to travel out of for the next couple days as mom and I explore the Luoyang area. We’re coming back to Zhengzhou where we’ll be picked up by my parents’ driver person to take us back to where they live in Heze, China.

Mom and I jumped on a 2.5 hour bus ride to Luoyang. I was impressed by the highway we took – so clean, new, and orderly! We were both impressed by how green and scenic the ride was, with trees lining the roadways, and green fields in the background. I hate comparing things to America but for good or for bad, that’s the standard my mind automatically jumps to. Quite nice… much nicer than most turnpikes/highways in the tristate area I’m from.

original city wall/entrance

We checked into our hotel and wandered around the area. We were both quite tired as we didn’t sleep much last night, so it’s been a low key day, wandering and figuring out the game plan for the next couple days. Tonight we went to the old city area where they have markets and stores. We tried a couple of food stalls and then ended up at KFC. My mom was not so up for trying all the street food – both my parents are pretty not adventurous on that end as they are into clean and safe (dad studied immunology…). I guess that’s not such a bad thing – the daily runs started shortly after setting foot in China and finally stopped after I got to Taiwan. Sorry TMI… My parents will eat the street food in Taiwan, but not on the mainland. I guess I can understand why but that won’t stop me.

old luoyang city night market

night market food with mom

My grandmom has called in a panic the past couple of days asking my mom about her finances... where she's hid things, etc. Gosh she really needs to learn to trust people with her things. I wish she would put her full faith in Him. He needs to be that center of her life. Only He can change her… all I can do is pray…

full day tomorrow as we head to Shaolin Temple and Longmen Grottos.

Egg overdose

wandering cool sts of tian zi fang

My mom and I have been wandering Shanghai, meeting up with my friend Lisa (who I’ve met up with nearly everywhere along this trip (except Taiwan) one day for lunch at this really cool Yunnan Restaurant (lost heaven) and then today meeting up with our friends from my home church who I’ve actually met a couple times around on this trip. Connecting with old friends, catching up, eating. We also visited Taikang St. - tian zi fang. A cute, architecturally old school, but inside filled with small art galleries, contemporary shops, and cafes and restaurants. We had coffee and an amazing carrot cake at a local coffee shop – delicious. I later took my mom to the delicious shen jian boa place that lisa introduced me too – yum. She agreed it was pretty good.

delish food at yunnan restaurant

            

attempt at a self pic of us eating
 the delish fried buns

pm coffee/carrot cake break
in tian zi fang cafe

After wandering today, my mom and I headed back to the apartment to grab our bags and say farewell before we headed to the airport to catch our flight for Zhengzhou (my mom and I are going to explore Luoyang area before heading to heze to meet my dad). My aunt’s sister and grandparents – the family friends we are staying next door to - insisted that we eat some of their home-cooked food, some of the ingredients grown in their own little garden. Honestly we would have preferred to grab food on our own at the airport cuz there’s plenty of good stuff there, but they insisted. In a rush and all, but we sat down and ate.. and the grandma kept forcing me to eat more. So many egg related items. I don’t even like eggs, but she kept spooning them over and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to refuse because it seemed like it would be disrespectful. So, I opened up my mouth and tossed all the food down, shoving it down with a huge smile on my face. I feel like I just overdosed on eggs. I don’t even like eggs! Ugh.

To add to that, the aunt gave us a bag full of hard boiled tea eggs. I know my mom is going force me to eat some despite my dislike for eggs. Oh man… not cool

I asked my mom why Chinese people and asians in general love eggs so much… and she said I’m the strange one so I should ask myself what’s wrong with me and why don’t I like eggs. Good point, I just don’t – I never have. I like some kinds of scrambled eggs and grew to like omelettes and don’t mind eggs on breakfast sandwiches, but other types – hard boiled, poached, fried, etc., I don’t like the smell, the texture, the taste. Unfortunately I think I ate all of the above methods of cooking eggs in that last meal. I am all egged out.

Oh, in the airport, I happened to look over at a tv and there was cartoon commercial talking about swing flue and how to protect yourself from it. And I saw quickly a line that said “swine flu comes from America”. I’m not sure why that comment was necessary. So if you see Chinese people running away from you for some random reason, probably because of this commercial.

Good Friday

I was hoping to find a Good Friday service for mom and I to attend, but unfortunately our flight is this evening when the services would be. It’s easy to forget Him and what happened over 2000 years ago, especially when you’re in a spiritually dry environment. Year after year, the reminder He brings me is the weather – it seems to always be rainy and/or dreary on Good Friday, wherever I happen to be, and it serves as a reminder of what happened on that day.

Thank you for what you for the reminder. Thank you for what you did for me. Thank you for giving me life.

Back to the mainland

Oh man… I didn’t notice it going from China to Taiwan, but as I waited for my flight back to China, the social-economic divide between the two really stood out. Right when I stepped into the waiting lounge at my gate for my flight back to the mainland, the loud conversations, the smells, the mannerisms, the pushiness… just very obvious… and quite annoying.

It wasn’t such a shock when I first came from America to China because I think I had expected it. I was giving Jenny the heads up on what to expect, so I think I more than prepared myself for it. Secondly, the diversity of the people in America versus the more homogenous Asian faces in China is a very obvious visual cue that reminds you to transition your mindset and set different expectations. Going from Taiwan to China – the people still look similar so that visual cue was not there, so it was a bit more of a shock that took some time to transition into.

On the plane, a lady asked if her husband could switch seats with me since she had one arm and could use some extra help. I had no problem switching, but little did I know I’d have this large dude who could probably use a shower and a few strong breath mints… all in my space and all… but I guess I might as well get used to it since I’m headed back to the mainland. Oh, then you got the ear and nose pickers. Thankfully no snot rockets or hacking up spit balls yet, but I’m sure once I arrive, that will come too. I love China for many reasons, but I still have a hard time getting past the hacking up spitball noise, the bathroom smells, and the pushy, no rules following culture.

Rules – simple things like keeping your seatbelt fastening on an airplane – you start hearing the unclicking right when the wheels touch ground.. some attempt to get up during the taxi to the gate. I like rules (not saying I obey them all the time but I try…most of the time).
Lines – there is no understanding of that at all. For example, let’s say there are 4 stalls in the ladies room. There will be 4 separate lines waiting at each stall. So it’s hit or miss how long you’ll be waiting depending on which line you pick – if someone’s having a grand ‘ole time on the potty, then you’re stuck there for a long while in your line.

After getting off the plane, I walked into the ladies room. The 5 stalls were full. There was one girl standing, waiting patiently. I stood behind her to form a line that led to any of the 4 stalls, like how we would line up in the ladies room in America. 1 girl walks in to the front of the line, sees that the stalls are full, looks over at us, and in shock says in Chinese: “oh, there’s a line”. “Yes, I respond”. She kind of giggles. I smirk. Another girl walks in, does same thing, and I tell her… “there’s a line”. She’s surprised and says “oh. Need to line up”. I was happy to have encouraged a line system. My turn to jump in a stall. I do my thing and come out of the stall, and I see… 5 separate lines, one behind each stall. All that work to have gone down the drain all in a matter of a minute. Okay, I guess I didn’t really work that hard for it, but I was hopeful… proud even if only for a brief moment of change in social behaviors, one lady at a time…

In general, education levels tend to be higher than other parts of the country, but just the pure numbers of people are enough to push you over the edge if you don’t prepare yourself beforehand. Especially if you’re one to take public transportation… and you need to jump on that metro to avoid rush hour car traffic but then you hit mad rush hour people traffic… although I find it to be less crazy then Beijing subway people traffic…

Several times the past couple days, I’ve found the evil side of me coming out, wanting to play the “my way is the right way” card. I want to supplant the rules and culture that I’m used to, that I grew up with, and make the local people follow and obey them. Or, I want to just push people back when they push me out of the way, or step on their heels purposefully when they cut me off. I am evil.. I need to repent for this vengeful, self-righteous heart of mine.. forgive me. Honestly, I am surprised by my own behavior. Usually I am very quick to adjust, and I consider myself, rightly or wrongly, to be pretty culturally sensitive, easily adaptable, not placing my opinions and what I believe to be right vs. wrong in foreign situations. But I think coming from Taiwan to China this time really threw me off. I’ll have to remember to set more realistic expectations.

I love China, for all its cool things and the frustrations. Need to set my heart right. Let's go!

Granddaughters and Grandpas 爷爷

4 years ago today, my 爷爷 – my grandpa on my dad’s side – passed away at the young age of 96. If you want to virtually meet him, I posted his bio and the tribute I gave at his memorial service: Tribute to Yeye (gramps). I do miss him, but I know and trust that he is in a much better place in our Father’s house. I think about him and my gramps on my mom’s side who is still in the hospital. I miss hanging out with grandpas. Maybe just in my family but I feel there is something special between a grandfather and granddaughter. I don’t know if that’s because I sometimes act like a 5 year old with my grandpa, or sometimes I treat my grandpa like a 5 year old, but whatever the case, I used to have a lot of fun with my gramps, even as Alzheimers got the most of him.

There’s the theory that you should not speak in baby talk to children. You should talk to them as adults and not dumb down their brain development. Some say that as you age and move into your elder years, your mental state becomes like that of a child. So, I wonder if that theory then reverses itself once you grow old. As people reach those late years and especially as they start losing their mental capacities, I wonder if it’s helpful to talk to them as children – not to disrespect their intelligence but simply to do what you have to do to get them to laugh and smile through the gunk that comes with aging.

Hanging with my gramps'
childhood friend and his wife

My mom and I are in Shanghai for a couple of days before we head off to explore Luoyang and meet my pops in Heze. We’re staying at my aunt – not an actual aunt but basically it’s my grandpa (mom’s side)’s childhood friend and classmate from the little village in Anhui province… his daughter’s apartment. With all this stuff about grandpas on my mind, this apartment we’re staying in happens to next door to this aunt’s mom and dads apartment. I also call the grandpa 爷爷, like I did my late grandpa, and the grandma 奶奶. Such a cute little old couple. 爷爷 is 97 years old and super cute. When he laughs and opens his mouth to say something, it just brings a smile to my face. People say you have “fu qi” fortune to live this long and praise it, but the reality is that in many cases, the health changes that accompany living so long brings down the “standard of living”, not economically but socially, mentally, emotionally, physically… as you reach those “fortune” years. The grandma seems sad for him – she is still so mentally and physically strong. Grandpa seems content despite the physical and mental deterioration, but it’s hard especially on grandma watching him change. Anyways, thankful for this brief opportunity to hang with 爷爷.

a blessing in disguise?

I came back to my grandparent’s apartment this morning after I a conference call over skype at some random hole in the wall food place (that happened to be broadcasting the Yankees game live) near my grandrents house. As I walked in, my brother was heading out the door to jump on the airport bus to fly back to hong kong. My mom and I quickly finished stuffing our bags and then jumped out to catch the next bus. My grandma was crying… didn’t want us to leave… worried how she would handle staying by herself… not an easy thing to see… don’t really know how to handle it. Selfishly it helps that we were in such a hurry to grab our bags and catch the bus. Praying she’ll be okay. Praying she'll find strength from above for everything that's going on in her life... in grandpa's life...

On the bus, my mom and I were talking about how growing forgetful through the aging process (becoming 胡涂), perhaps described as the early stages of Alzheimers, can be blessing in disguise. It may be harder on the family; however for the individual, it may not be a horrible thing. For my grandmom, we were thinking that she’ll probably shortly forget her sadness and us leaving, and will start thinking and worrying about something else. Growing forgetful in this instance, will allow her to move on and continue on with her normal life, as opposed to mourning us leaving and depressing herself down to a dark narrow place that would be diffulct to pull herslf out of. So perhaps, a blessing here. It does frustrate us when we're with her when she forgets things that we told her, or forgets where she hides things and stuff... but in this situation we are thankful.

As you age, more will happen, whether it’s to you or to those around you. It’s sad to realize you yourself are getting older, that those around you may be passing away, that your body and memory are failing. But perhaps growing forgetful is a blessing in disguise after all. I just hope some of the devo’s she’s been reading will sink deep into her heart and not be forgotten and transform her into a faithful child of His.

Squatty toilets and a greyhound head

My girl cousin, the only other girl in 2 generations in dad’s side of the family, gave me an answer to the issue I have been perplexed by for years, since I first stepped foot into an Asian country in 2000. The key is to squatt facing the toilet drain hole. It should be in front. Thank you ya ya! She agreed it is confusing but she’s got much practice with them and is pretty confident that is the proper posture.

Oh… and my mom today was looking at me and said… “you really do look like goldie”. Goldie is my late doggy sister. She’s a greyhound. What my mom was inferring was that i, like Goldie, have a small head and a large body relative to my head size. “thanks mom”. Later in the day, my grandmom started talking about Goldie for some odd reason. I wondered why she randomly thought of Goldie, but then was reminded of my mom’s comment. Perhaps it was me, because of my physical similarity to a greyhound, that reminded her of Goldie.

Preach it!

A few times in Taiwan, I overheard my grandma and/or my mom just openly asking people, whether it was the taxi driver or my gramp’s hospital roommate, whether they were believers or not. I’m put to shame by how bold they are, as I sit in the corner silently reading the good book on my own. Even though I would say they don’t have a solid grasp of the gospel, it doesn’t stop them.
The hospital roomate’s family said that they are Buddhist. My grandma replied “oh, that’s great. Good for you guys. Good that you have that.” I was inspired by the boldness of even asking the question… not so much by the second response.

I need to be more desensitized to what others think – how others will react. I think too much about what their response will be, and not enough about what really matters, that is, spreading the good news, spreading and planting seeds. I reconnected with a college friend earlier this year who is doing campus ministry – we served together in college. He introduced me to his staff buddies as being one of the most courageous and boldest – not afraid to share and bring Him into conversations and into people’s lives. Was he talking about the same person.. I wondered… not remembering this courage because I seem to lack it today. I sit and wait for “the opportune” time, waiting and waiting, praying for it. Sometimes the door opens and I boldly say a few words. Other times the door opens and I sit there twiddling my thumbs wanting to say something but don’t. And then other times I wait and wait and wait for that ideal time, soon after forgetting it all in all. I seem to have lost that vigor… that true heart for the lost. If I really cared, I wouldn’t hold back. Perhaps I’ve been jaded by the harsh responses I’ve heard in the past few years. I’m inspired by the boldness of my mom and grandmom. If I truly loved my friends and family, then I would care more and my heart would ache more for them.

Grow my heart for you. Grow my heart for your people, for the friends, families, and even strangers you’ve placed around me, that you divinely place into my walk each day. Give me the boldness to love with my words and with my actions.

the most amazing pineapple cakes

So a really awesome Taiwanese snack is 风立素 – pineapple cake. The ones you get in the states at the Asian grocery store… eh, they’re OK… after all, that’s the only option available. But when friends and family go back to Taiwan, a must buy and must bring back is this pineapple cake. My mom usually gets these pretty delicious ones from taipei… BUT, we found an even more amazing place per a recommendation from a friend. Wow, they are as good as people say they are to be. At the Jia De Bakery… made fresh… perfect amount of flakyness, with a light crisp on the buttery outside, pineapple filling oh so fresh and soft… mmm… delish. I just wish we had more room in our luggage to bring these things back! Boo!

In general, the bakeries here are to die for. The sweet smell of butter… what else could you ask for. The problem is that you have these bakeries, that you cannot walk into or walk by without wanting to buy and eat something… but the other non-bakery food is also delish… so you’re stomach is constantly packed with food… and your scent and sight senses are overly stimulated all the time. Trouble. We've been spending most of our time in the hospital, but even the hospital has so much in food options that are actually quite decent! Not as good as street level but not too bad.

First thing I did when I arrived in Taipei was to find a gym. I found a pretty big chain in Taipei. Looked into their classes and all… even visited one… but have failed to actually make my way IN to the gym and engage my body in exercise. Oh man I need it so badly.. one for all the stuff I’ve been stuffing my face with and two… I need to sweat out all the crap in my mind. Oh well.. perhaps in China I’ll find a gym.

don't cry please

Oh man, this morning I was sitting eating brunch with my grandmom in her apartment before heading to the hospital, and she came to the realization that we (my mom, my bro, and I) were all leaving on Wednesday. We’ve told her and she’s known, but with her memory, she keeps forgetting. Agh…

teaching grandmom how to
type in chinese

So my mom is on the computer in the bedroom, my brother is in the bathroom showering, the helper lady is in the kitchen, and I’m in the living room with her at the table, and she’s mumbling like she often does, trying to convince herself that she’ll be fine staying by herself now that grandpa is in the hospital… and all of a sudden, she bursts out crying! Oh man… I totally did not expect that… I was totally caught off guard and didn’t know what to do… except go and grab tissues.

The tears stopped soon after but I thought she’d be okay with us leaving but I’m realizing just how hard this will be. We all know she can stay on her own, as she's done it before... in fact just 2 months earlier she was staying by herself... after gramps entered hospital and before my mom arrived in Taipei... but she's just a nervous person... scared of everything... it seems like the more she stresses, the more forgetful she gets, and the more flustered she is, which gets us all fired up. Sometimes..oftentimes... she says stuff that is hard to accept and allow her to continue thinking a certain way... it's hard to be patient and not raise your voice sometimes. sometimes you have to be harsh in order to get her to hear you and not bring herself down to a more negative place... but i hate that. i hate yelling... i hate being in the middle of loud "discussion"... I’m worried about her, but at the same time want to help her grow out of this dependency on people thing (since she can't trust people anyways) and draw her strength from Him above and fully trust Him.

The family is still making decision… thought they came to agreement but the ortho surgeon came in today gave his 10 cents which brings us back to square 1... wait and not amputate yet... plus gramps is against it completely... and we will respect his wishes of course, but he also not of clear mind either so we'll see...

wang youngest sibling strength: general kindness to humanity

missing a few wangs over post din drinks

had a good weekend catching up, hanging out, and eating with family... aunts, uncles, cousins... 3 of my cousins live in taipei, another who grew up in jerz and works in kaoshiung, and our youngest cousins live an hour away in hsinchu.  we're all pretty close so those that were in taiwan came into taipei... we had a good time hanging and eating... but exhausting when we're with our little crazy but cute ones... oh man it's tiring running around with the little 6 and 8 year old.  kind of funny too that we're all the same generation yet with such a large age gap.

it's so interesting to see the commonalities among the uncles, and now across the cousins too.  we had a good chat about this over afternoon tea at this traditional old school teahouse.  we were thinking of competitions we could have between #1 vs. #2/#3 kid in each family, but the sad conclusion is that #1 would more or less beat us (#2/#3) in just about everything, except... "general kindness to humanity"... care for the world... caring for others.

My brother and the oldest in each of the 4 fams... they are very smart... exceptionally book smart so they do well academically.  They are also athletic and pretty musically inclined too.  They take their performance very seriously... it's personal so they get distraught when they don't get first or top place.  I don't know if that's still the case but at least as kids (i found out last night over dinner my parents actually told my brother in high school to go have more fun... go out... go drink... cuz his grades are good enough... i totally got the opposite instructions!).

roaming taipei sts w the wang boys.
playing some cooler version of
rock paper scissors that i
have yet to figure out.

The youngest in each family... we're a bit more chill.. more flexible... we needed more help... as my guidance counselor told me as she went to write my college rec letter: you and your brother are very different.  school was easy for him... he didn't have to study... you... you're more well rounded.  in chinese, my cousin (also the youngest) and i always say that we are "dai dai de"... translated as spacey... in our own world.. his bro and my bro always make fun of us telling us as babies we would be spacey and drool...  we're pickier eaters too... our older siblings will more or less eat anything and everything.

in general though, we all did pretty well in school, but we (#2/#3) had to work so much harder.  #1 set such high standards it made it so much harder for us!  we are pretty athletic but our older siblings are too and could probably beat us in whatever sport.  so the conclusion is that the only competition we would win... is a competition on general kindness to mankind... if there could be such a competition.  well, it's too hard to say for the youngest cousins so we'll have to continue testing our theory as they get older.

the other interesting thing... the wang girls.  there's only 2 of us (out of 9) and we're both the youngest in each family, so you can bet we're a bit more spoiled than the boys, both from our dads and uncles, but also from the grandparents (grandparents had 4 boys).  even though she's 10 years younger or so, grew up in taiwan in a completely different environment and different childhood, somehow our personalities are still very similar.

our random wanderings took us
by a petstore with these posters.

strangers... but family...

friend: "wait, so who are you meeting?"
me: "a friend of a friend"
friend: "so you don't know her"
me: "nope"
friend: "strange. so what will you do?  how will you find her"
me: "we'll just hang out.  she'll be wearing pink converses and holding a pink camera bag"
friend: "okay. interesting."

I guess I didn't think twice about meeting up with a complete stranger that I knew nothing about, except that she is a sister.  What else do I need to know?  I've basically been doing that past few weeks - getting connected to people and organizations... walking through doors He's opened... going with the flow.  So when my friend Carmen, who served in Taiwan last year(?), asked if I could meet up with her friend, a new sister, the only answer was "OF COURSE - I would LOVE to".  And I'm so thankful we did get to meet... a new friend... a sister... family... right away... because we share a Father who loves us and saved us and created sisterhood (and brotherhood).  Anyhow, we had a good time wandering the streets of Danshui, a northern coastal part of Taipei right along the ocean.  We ate, walked (visited a beautiful Church in the area), talked, took lots of photos, shared, and prayed.  A sweet time of sharing and fellowship. Some photos of our time together.

public bathroom stalls

Oh... so an update on the squatty toilets post.  After some information gathering from my new friend... because naturally a normal question you'd ask someone you've never met before... she said you face the direction that the flusher step/button is at.  Now, this sometimes contradicts what my other friend said about positioning over the hole in the toilet.  I will continue on my quest to find the right answer.  BTW, I must say, the public toilets in Taipei are quite impressive... large... relatively clean... and not bad at all.

Afterwards I wandered my way back to the hospital to see my gramps and family.  Had some challenges finding the bus to take me to the hospital, but after asking several people, wandering aimlessly, I made my way onto the right bus - thank God!  :)  Gramps was in a better mood today... at least during the brief time I was there.  He was pretty funny... the prayers are covering him... me... the family... thank you.

Oh, last night, I met up with old friends from my home church in pton who just moved their family here in the past year to serve.  Had a great time catching up and hearing and seeing what they're up to in Taiwan... wish I had more time to spend with them...

Tomorrow I visit a dentist here in Taipei to take care of some annoying tooth thing I've had for the past couple months.  I've never been to any dentist other than ones in America so I'm not sure what to expect, but I hope things aren't too different than from the states!   My brother also flew in today from HK... last minute fly by to say hi to the family - literally booked flight like 12 hours ago... looking forward to some good family time this weekend with my dad's side of fam... cool aunt and uncles... little crazy baby cousins and the old ones (my age)...

make me a bird so i can fly far far away.

Ps. 52:8 But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God. I trust in the steadfast love of God forever and ever.

God this is so hard. I'm sick of Mr. Brown's bad tasting expensive coffee, so I'm sitting against the other side of Mr. Brown's wall at the McDonalds, stealing their wifi. I couldn't sit in my gramps room any longer. The tears were beginning to flow... it's just not a good situation. The dr. came by to share some news, and while it's nothing new, it's a decision that the family needs to make, that they have differing opinions on. So many factors to consider at this old age... prolong his life but take away his legs or watch him slowly suffer and grow into a constantly angry old man as the rest of us tries to eat and do things to prolong his life... and watch my grandma worry her mind and heart off.

I started losing it when my gramps started tearing up, shouting in Chinese... something to the likes of "sacrifice for the country - what's wrong with that... sacrifice for the country..." His mental state is also not great right now - most of the time his mind is clear as the sky (in America... too polluted in Asia for that to be good), but sometimes he gets in these rants. My gramps was pretty senior in the military so I guess those past memories are filling his mind. Then he's yelling at us for trying to force him to eat... nearly spit his pills at me but luckily I still have decent reflexes to jump out of the way. God this is so hard. I had to leave the room as he continued to share about some past stuff, his eyes filled with tears. I just can't handle it. It makes me sad...and helpless. Just eat gosh darn it. Just take your medicine. Just try... we're not a family that gives up. You not eating is making it really hard on the rest of us. Grandma is so worried, and I hate being in the middle of mom and grandma's bickerings... I imagine myself in that field where Ginny and Forrest run to where they pray "make me a bird so I can fly far far away..." or something like that. But I also want to be here...

...so, I run down to the hospital basement to let it out... at a McDs... in my blog... I feel better already. I gotta head back up. Signing off.

flower power

Today my mom and I had a date at the Taipei International Flora Expo. As a kid, I was surrounded by flowers because one of my best friend's family owned a florist, so I spent quite a bit of time wandering through greenhouses, rollerblading, running, playing, and all that fun stuff kids do... only in greenhouses. But I guess I never quite acquired that green thumb or ever fell in love with flowers... perhaps being surrounded by it made it lose its impression on me. I mean, I still think they are beautiful, most of the time, but I don't get that all warm and fuzzy and romantic when they're in front of me. Nonetheless, this expo has attracted quite the attention both in Taiwan and across the world, so figured it's worth the visit.

First observation... the numbers! So many people in line to get tickets and to get into the different pavilions. It felt like Disney World at times, only the 30-120 minute lines led to exhibits and displays, not exhilarating rides. Apparently one of the exhibits, the Pavilion of Dreams or something or other... you have to wait in line at 5-6AM to get a free ticket to even get into the pavilion later in the day. I must say though, I was impressed by how organized the staff and volunteers operated. Numbers entering each pavilion and expo were controlled well, and despite the long wait times, they managed it really well. I was also impressed by the huge public bathrooms! I have never seen such large public bathrooms... we need more of those in the states at big events like this! Oh, one other observation, that I had catch myself on... Taiwanese people and visitors are so much more well mannered and "civilized" than the mainland. In China, you have to push and shove your way through crowds to get anywhere. It frustrates you at first, but then you just kind of assimilate... because you have to. I found myself wanting to shove myself through, forgetting that I was not in China, but quickly realized I was being that annoying person fighting my way through the crowds...while others were being quite orderly. Oops! I quickly put my more civilized mannerisms back on.

In addition to the many flowers and plants we saw, we also visited "EcoARK - the Pavilion of New Fashion". I was most eager to see this exhibit over the others, despite there not being any flowers inside, because it is the world's greenest building ever... made out of 1.52 million recycled PET bottles. Here are some pics from the flora expo.

bldg made of these PET bottles

trash tree and bear...
recycled plant made bottles

USA Pavilion  

USA pavilion

Representing USA - Potatoes

PA Spotting

Chinese family donning
representative USA hats

Taiwan's representation of Canada... salmon.

     

 

enjoying the many street stall'ish
foods at the expo with mom

nice translation...
"a drink fries the stuffed dumpling"