something that's been on my mind lately, as i am feeling somewhat inadequate and overwhelmed by "things to do" is what it means to invest in people's lives and to truly love them as He loved us. I am just reminded of just how selfish I am. There are people in my life who are going through rough times, ppl who need some 'yarping' as my friend Jenn would say, ppl who need to vent and talk, ppl who need to be loved and cared for... and I say I want to be there and my heart aches for them, yet it's so easy for me to get bogged down in what I, personally, need to do and take care of, that I neglect those relationships that He's placed in my hands and my heart. I'm reminded of JC, who invested in the lives of 12 people, while I am challenged by investing in the lives of just a couple. I mean, I know I'm not Him... but He's my role model.
I'm asking simply for Him to teach me to prioritize His plans... and to help me to completely trust Him. I get stressed thinking about the things I need to do... but to what end and to whose purpose? I'm bogged down by society's pressures... getting my company up... building a brand... getting work and clients... and sometimes my mind wanders to entering the job market. I think to much about making a life here on earth.. income, money, life in America... Let's face it - I haven't completely surrendered and I have a trust problem. It's so easy for me to blind myself and convince myself of who is leading what and where. I'm sure I've posted the lyrics to this song on my blog before, but it's one of my favorites and it's my prayer right now... "Use Me Here" by Everybody Duck...
Use Me Here, Where I am, I'm not gonna pray anymore that You'll change Your plans.
Despite my fear, I place my life in Your hands. The future can wait, tomorrow might be too late,
So Jesus use me here.
I lay my hearts desires at your feet, o Lord. Take all the plans I've made and all my dreams.
Blinded by triumphs of tomorrow, I've let sin control today.
I tell myself I want to know Your will, O Lord. Still I confess I've had plans of my own.
But from now on I plan to listen to Your will and to obey.
Use Me Here, Where I am, I'm not gonna pray anymore that You'll change Your plans.
Despite my fear, I place my life in Your hands. The future can wait, tomorrow might be too late,
So Jesus use me here.
