sometimes, i draft thoughts and reflections while they are fresh, but never get to posting them because I want to add photos or other additional thoughts... other times, weeks and months after the thought/situation/event, when I go to organize photos, I recall the thoughts and feelings at the time, and then jot it down. better late than never... better than forgotten, although so much has already been forgotten.
I don't really know who else reads this. I'm kind of curious but at the same time I don't really care. This is more for me than for you (sorry!). I found out recently one of my closest friends did not even know I had this blog... and... uh.. not that i'm trying to hide anything... this is on the web after all... but it was kind of nice to know it's still kind of "private"... yet in the public realm... sort of... At the end of the day, this is an outlet for me to remember, reflect, think, process, whatever. Enjoy the journey if you'd like to... enjoy (or judge) the madness... my weird, convoluted thoughts...
so as i write this, i will be backposting things from 2013 and earlier in 2014 i'm sure...drafts are already in the folder but for now... i will continue moving forward into 2015. But a closing word for 2014... thankful. I am thankful. In this last week of the year, I've been able to catch up with old friends from my childhood. Even though we see each other once a year or less, I can't help but be so thankful that God placed these individuals in my life to help mold and shape me. Friends who knew me as a quiet and shy kid to a bratty pre-teen who thought she was too cool for school... spiritual leaders, mentors, teachers, peers in my life who shaped my character and modeled Christ's character in how they cared, loved, prayed, and invested in me. Just thankful.
I'm also thankful that God is truly my "wonderful counselor". I think Jesus is referred to as the wonderful counselor in Isaiah somewhere, but I know the "title" more from some song that I can't seem to remember at the moment (my memory is so bad...). I never really thought about what that actual means... our "wonderful counselor"... it probably has much deeper meaning... but for me right now, He has and continues to be my awesome counselor who listens, who observes, who truly knows me... and who guides, coaches, and leads me through the messyness of life. I don't know what i'd do if i didn't have God to pray, share, process with. Sure, I have close friends but sometimes, either because i'm in a foreign land and I have no one to process with... or simply because i'm so distraught that i don't want to talk or see anyone no matter how close they are to me... i just want to be alone and have a pity party or something... pout.. i don't know... Even in this past year, there have been moments feeling hopeless, heartbroken by the sights, the people trapped in horrible situations, the stories. Without God to cry out to, I just don't know how I could have continued forward. He has always answered.. He has always spoken, even when I was so perplexed and honestly kind of mad at God, and couldn't even peep out a prayer other than the word "why". He has always been faithful, counseling me, helping me process. He's given me glimpses of His huge heart... He's grown my perspective for how He views people and this world... It can't be a coincidence that the words I need to hear are impressed through my ear or eyes and into my heart during those times of heart break or anger or frustration. So... 2014... I'm thankful for my wonderful counselor, who understands, who is with me all the time, and indeed gives the best counsel all the time... in the good times, and the most challenging times.
Onto 2015.
I'm also thankful that God is truly my "wonderful counselor". I think Jesus is referred to as the wonderful counselor in Isaiah somewhere, but I know the "title" more from some song that I can't seem to remember at the moment (my memory is so bad...). I never really thought about what that actual means... our "wonderful counselor"... it probably has much deeper meaning... but for me right now, He has and continues to be my awesome counselor who listens, who observes, who truly knows me... and who guides, coaches, and leads me through the messyness of life. I don't know what i'd do if i didn't have God to pray, share, process with. Sure, I have close friends but sometimes, either because i'm in a foreign land and I have no one to process with... or simply because i'm so distraught that i don't want to talk or see anyone no matter how close they are to me... i just want to be alone and have a pity party or something... pout.. i don't know... Even in this past year, there have been moments feeling hopeless, heartbroken by the sights, the people trapped in horrible situations, the stories. Without God to cry out to, I just don't know how I could have continued forward. He has always answered.. He has always spoken, even when I was so perplexed and honestly kind of mad at God, and couldn't even peep out a prayer other than the word "why". He has always been faithful, counseling me, helping me process. He's given me glimpses of His huge heart... He's grown my perspective for how He views people and this world... It can't be a coincidence that the words I need to hear are impressed through my ear or eyes and into my heart during those times of heart break or anger or frustration. So... 2014... I'm thankful for my wonderful counselor, who understands, who is with me all the time, and indeed gives the best counsel all the time... in the good times, and the most challenging times.
Onto 2015.
