Venturing Beyond the Corporate Walls… 2 inches at a time.

So what is the next step for Tammy Wang? Well, I’m still in utter shock that I’m old enough to be working, and have somehow been with Lincoln for the past 6 years of my life! I can’t believe it! Granted I have had 4-5 different roles in those 6 years, but am still shocked I have stayed in corporate America, in financial services for so long. I always knew I’d jump back into a focus on social issues and helping others. That’s always been my passion, and I knew joining Lincoln out of college that my journey through Lincoln would be purposeful, deliberate... intentional. I mean... I won't go into details now; but as a senior in college, I had narrowed my job decision to two options: 1) Lincoln; or 2) IVCF staff. Seemingly opposite extremes... but... not really. Anyhow, with much prayer, advice, and thoughtful consideration, I joined Lincoln. I knew I was there for a reason, and one of those reasons was to equip me and prepare me for a future "something" geared at the heart and passion that He's given me.

So how does one describe this “something”? Well, I’m not really sure, but I’m ready to embark there. In about a week, I will be switching to a 3-day work schedule at Lincoln, giving me those 2 other days to focus on that “something”. So a quick summary of how this panned out – I try to get “let go” but fail. I stick around for a couple months, and then decide I indeed needed to go. I inform my boss that I would resign at the end of the summer. Fast forward to, well, the end of summer. No replacement yet but plenty of work. Part-time gig. I wasn’t sure of the plan at first, but as I thought about it, and as my boss reminded me of my active, somewhat adventurous lifestyle, hinting at my need for medical benefits, I figured it might be a good transition strategy, both for Lincoln and for me personally. A couple extra days to focus on the “it” while also still having some income and benefits. I figured the worst that could happen would be to quit if the schedule wasn’t working out.

I’m excited to get focused. I have some business ideas and models in my mind, but not sure exactly how it will all work out... but I'm learning to trust Him. Looking back, it's so obvious how He has been revealing it piece by piece to me through conversations and experiences He's given me. Gotta pray more about it... So I guess right now, I’m not totally stepping out of the boat and onto the water. It’s kind of like stepping out of the boat, but with a life preserver I guess?

Which reminds of an interesting conversation I had with my parents when I told them I wanted to leave my job. The amazing thing was, for both my parents, it started out very poorly (i.e. me in tears sitting in my car in a starbux parking lot, on my cell phone with my parents), but within an hour, God totally changed their hearts. It was amazing! Not to say they are total fans of me quitting and stuff; but they seem to be more understanding of me doing this... so the conversation with both my parents went something like this: “what? What do you mean you want to quit? What happened?..." so both my parents thought I got yelled at or something happened at work that would cause me to rashly decide to quit... and then them not understanding why I would leave a stable, "good" job... and then as my dad and I finish up our conversation since both of us had to go to meetings, he started talking to me about horses and ponys.... as we're having this serious conversation with me in tears in the starbux parking lot.

Dad: "Tammy, it's just that it's easier to jump from a moving horse to a moving horse"
Tammy: "What? What are you talking about?"
Dad: "You know... while you are working at a strong, moving company, you look for another strong moving company while you are still working, and you jump to that new moving horse if that opportunity makes sense."
Tammy: "Oh... but dad, I want to jump from a moving horse to a pony".
Dad: "Okay... well, that's better than walking."
Tammy: "But sometimes you have to jump off the horse to nurture the pony".
Dad: "Umm... ok, let's talk about this later."

Then my mom leaves me a voicemail while I'm in a meeting that she supports my decision but asks if I've thought about asking for a leave of absence, and in Chinese says: "and mommy can take you for a walk"... travel together and stuff... counseling from mom.

and then I get an email from my dad:
.......................
hi Tammy,
thank you for sharing your thoughts with me this morning. i respect your decision and am 99% supporting. the 1% concerns are:

1. catching a horse (even pony) is easier if you are riding one than on foot.
2. ...
....
8...

in short, you get my support (so is mom's) and good luck. as always, we put your welfare before ours.

love, Dad
.........
I'll save you from the other 7 points that add up to the 1%; but anyhow, it was really awesome to have their support, even though I definitely still get push back from a practical sense...

i'll share more as things progress...

Current Events – Triathlon, Vick, Kennedy

Indeed it has been awhile since my last update, but it’s not that I haven’t thought about updating. I have – but I guess when it came down to putting it in writing, well, then life just happened. Things I’ve been thinking about but clearly just passing thoughts since after a day or two, the subject passed or was replaced but the next compelling subject or current event. I guess I do have A.D.D.

I wanted to write about doing my first triathlon – no, I did not drown and yes, I still cannot float, but I did survive. Actually, we, doing it with my girlfriends, all survived. It was so fun training together, and every training session was a reminder of the Christian walk. It requires discipline, dedication, and focus. I had to keep reminding myself to “find the cross”, whether I was running down a sidewalk, on a treadmill, swimming in a pool or lake, or biking the road or spinning in a gym class. The cross is everywhere, and when I focus on it, He sustains me. The simple act of discipline in training and not giving up is so minute compared to the suffering Jesus went through for me. He didn’t give up for such a grand task and responsibility – I surely can handle the physical and mental challenge He’s given me the mind, body, and heart to conquer.

Then Michael Vick signed by the Eagles? How funny is it that the days after the announcement, my company angry calls and emails against what “we” did. Yes, we have branding rights over the stadium, but our relationship to Eagles management? Anyhow, I was thinking about the Philadelphia “welcome” of Vick to the Eagles – typical angry fans, Philly style. I don’t really follow sports – I just really like playing them – but as I thought about the negative reactions the public was expressing against him and the Eagles for signing him, I couldn’t help but think of me, a wretched person who does horrible things daily, whether it’s expressed publicly or just in mind and thought, and yet my Heavenly Father still accepts me and welcomes me with open arms. Vick served his sentence and seems to be truly sorry for what he did. Who am I to judge? That sin thing really sucks.

And more recently, just this past week, the passing of Senator Teddy Kennedy. Can’t say I personally knew the man, but I surely do have a lot of respect for him. Yes there were poor decisions along the way with Chapaquick and other things I’m sure, but again, who am I to judge? To see and hear his “foes” from a political standpoint get teary eyed about his death is a testament to the skill and dedication of this man.

I used to say to my family that I wanted to become the President so I could change things – make things right – fix everything that’s messed up. Yes, idealistic but I guess that's how I'm tuned. Yesterday they were showing replays of Kennedy’s speech back in the 70s, relinquishing his fight for ever running for President, and instead, committing to serving the American people through his Senate seat. I couldn’t help but ponder whether I too would one day enter the political spectrum. I claim that politicians are not effective and government itself is just too bureaucratic and inefficient. But as I was listening to them playback some of the success of Teddy Kennedy, I was impressed. The things that he fought for and won are real actions that have affected me… title IX for example. One day, we’ll see. I don’t think I could be the President – I’m not such a fan of debating. But then again, politicians debate and argue a lot too, but we’ll see where life leads. Well, right now at least, live day by day... learning to follow His lead.