be still... i am yours...

starting ur own biz is hard.  it's hard because i don't want what the world wants... so at least i say so but inside there's still that tug that pulls me towards the cares of the world.  i care what He wants, but it's really hard.  so many voices, so many opinions, so many things that make sense according to your training but may not make sense in the bigger His eyes picture.  things that are counter-everything you've been taught in the academic and professional world. it's like being choked.  i want to give up.  i want to run away.

earlier today i had a meeting with a lady who's generously helping me with some of my brand identity work simply because she likes what i'm trying to do... but as we talk more and more, i don't really know if what we are discussing is what He wants.  i feel like as we get into discussion, she's leading me another way which makes sense from a worldly sense, but it's not where i was going.  it's an uncomfortable place to be in because from a business standpoint, what she says makes sense.  i find myself jumping on her bandwagon.  but then inside something doesn't feel right.  i feel uncomfortable... confused... lost... maybe it's insecurity... maybe it's the tug that I need to re-focus on Him...  gosh my wandering mind and heart... it's hard.  i had to stop working on the brand identity stuff and shift to something else and get my mind off of it...  

but as i sit here in today's virtual office at sbux, pandora streams in the background and the familiar songs play and the words are minister to my heart...

When the oceans rise and thunders roar... I will soar with You above the storm... Father you are King over the flood... I will be still and know You are God... Find rest my soul... In Christ alone... Know His power... In quietness and trust (Hillsong, be still)

... you catch me when i fall... you told me who i am... i am yours...   whom shall i fear... i am yours... i am yours... (casting crowns, who am i)

..it's you i live for everyday... it's you i live for everyday... it's you i live for everyday... (hillsong, everyday)

thanks...