family times... and happy chinese new year!

Once again... it's been awhile.  It's kind of sad that I didn't know that Chinese New Year is here... show's you how un-Asian I truly am.  Last year for Chinese New Year, I was in Vancouver with my brother and sister-in-law's family, hangin with the family, exploring Vancouver, cheering on the good 'ole USA in the Olympics, skiing Whistler near the Olympic course, and getting "hong bao" (red envelopes stuffed with money!!!).  My family is so Americanized we don't really get into the red envelopes - we feast, maybe do a small envelope exchange... but not a huge deal.  Although thinking about it now, I'm kind of sad that my family is all out of town for the holiday.  My dad just called from the lobby of a hotel in HK to catch up and wish me a Happy Chinese New Year - how festive (sarcastic).  My bro and mom and dad are all in HK, timing just kind of worked out.. and I know they aren't there to celebrate the New Year there together like a family vaca..., I kind of wish I were there with them.  Yeah... I got a little sad...

I also found out today, through email (i guess some communication is better than none), that my grandpa is in the hospital - combination of broken hip that was caused by something in the brain and blood sugar... I don't know.  Once again, I'm kind of sad... kind of disappointed in myself.  My grandpa is in the hospital, and I feel like I should be more concerned, but I feel like I'm more sad that I'm not sad.  Has it just not hit me?  So this is my mom's dad, who lived in Maryland for much of my life.  While they've only recently moved back to Taiwan, I'm amazed, and disappointed in myself... for allowing physical distance affect my relationship with them.  Wow.  For a moment, I was brought back to the memory of being next to my grandpa (on my dad's side) as he was passing, and the emotions of that night... I mean, I know this gramps is not at that stage, but just a passing thought.

What else... well, with the fam all in Asia I am officially the family mail(wo)man, bill payer, errand runner, and snow shoveler.  This, I must say, has taken quite a bit of my time and energy... running back and force b/w NJ, NYC, Philly... through treacherous snowstorms and everything.  Oh the things we do for family.

prioritization help!

something that's been on my mind lately, as i am feeling somewhat inadequate and overwhelmed by "things to do" is what it means to invest in people's lives and to truly love them as He loved us.  I am just reminded of just how selfish I am.  There are people in my life who are going through rough times, ppl who need some 'yarping' as my friend Jenn would say, ppl who need to vent and talk, ppl who need to be loved and cared for... and I say I want to be there and my heart aches for them, yet it's so easy for me to get bogged down in what I, personally, need to do and take care of, that I neglect those relationships that He's placed in my hands and my heart.  I'm reminded of JC, who invested in the lives of 12 people, while I am challenged by investing in the lives of just a couple.  I mean, I know I'm not Him... but He's my role model.

I'm asking simply for Him to teach me to prioritize His plans... and to help me to completely trust Him.  I get stressed thinking about the things I need to do... but to what end and to whose purpose?  I'm bogged down by society's pressures... getting my company up... building a brand... getting work and clients... and sometimes my mind wanders to entering the job market. I think to much about making a life here on earth.. income, money, life in America... Let's face it - I haven't completely surrendered and I have a trust problem. It's so easy for me to blind myself and convince myself of who is leading what and where.  I'm sure I've posted the lyrics to this song on my blog before, but it's one of my favorites and it's my prayer right now... "Use Me Here" by Everybody Duck...

Use Me Here, Where I am, I'm not gonna pray anymore that You'll change Your plans.
Despite my fear, I place my life in Your hands. The future can wait, tomorrow might be too late,
So Jesus use me here.

I lay my hearts desires at your feet, o Lord. Take all the plans I've made and all my dreams.
Blinded by triumphs of tomorrow, I've let sin control today.

I tell myself I want to know Your will, O Lord. Still I confess I've had plans of my own.
But from now on I plan to listen to Your will and to obey.

Use Me Here, Where I am, I'm not gonna pray anymore that You'll change Your plans.
Despite my fear, I place my life in Your hands. The future can wait, tomorrow might be too late,
So Jesus use me here.

I give you my life???

There's been a lot on my mind lately.  I suppose this is often the case, but the past couple of weeks in particular have been challenging because it involved commitment, decisions, and deadlines.  It's been especially hard because there is just so much uncertainty in my life right now.  It's hard for me to make a commitment to something, even something I believe in and hits at the core of my heart, when other things in my life are in flux.  The other thing in my life is my job - the organization I am building.

So often, I think about how much easier it would be to go back to a regular job at a company... other times I think about going back to school... other times I think about moving to my parents house and figuring things out there, where it would be free to live, no Philly city tax... but I'd be stuck in the middle of nowhere.  If any of those options were to prevail, then I could not feasibly commit to this decision I had to make which is around a leadership position at my Church.  Everything about the role is stuff that my heart breaks about - but did I really have to commit to it?  Can't I just help out? What if I need to move?  What if life leads elsewhere?

So anyhow, I've been in this wrestling match with Him on whether or not to accept the potential opportunity or not. As the deadline approached this week, I was torn up.  I felt sick, anxious, stressed...  in my desire to follow Him, I feared making the wrong decision.... and as I prayed and mulled over this to feeling ill... I realized that my fear was not so much the wrong decision, but a fear of fully entrusting my life to Him.  Was I really doing His will?  Was I really willing to give it ALL up to Him and let him take control? Was I?  Verbally I said yes, but deep down, did I really, really really believe it?  Probably not...

After I quit my job in February, my prayer was that He would take control - that I would be forced to depend on Him fully for everything, for my every day's needs, for the vision of EdGE, for my life.  I've been so lucky to have that consulting project that provided some income, but now that that's wrapped up, my natural instinct is to figure out, okay, what's next??? ... and broker it myself... because... well, sometimes its hard to not take control of your life.  That's how our culture works.  That's how I've been raised.  Those "reality" questions are the ones I face from my parents all the time.  I want to trust Him fully but in the back of my mind I can't help but doubt.  What is EdGE - is this really what I should be doing?  His answer was "yes" to that as He totally allowed me to locate my incorporation papers that I had misplaced but needed for some application.  I happened to be carrying a box of old files upstairs and a folder was open with the incorporation paper sitting inside right in my eyes' view.  That could not be random - there is no reason why it should have been in that box and there is no reason why I would have normally looked at that box and there is no explanation for that folder to be slightly open with that paper in it.  Ok, so that's pretty clear...

As I pleaded with him the other night to help me know where He wanted me, I "randomly" flipped through His book and landed, once again "randomly" to some chapters and verses that just happened to have had special meaning to me in the past... He once again affirmed that He knows... He is there... it's okay. He filled me with His joy and laughter and sweetness as He touched my heart with His words that needed to read and hear... starting with a chapter on "do not be anxious"... and ending with one of my favorite verses... Luke 12: 48 -- "... Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required, and from him to whom they entrusted much, they will demand the more."  That was it - that sealed the deal.  I knew where He wanted me.

I finally feel at peace about EdGE and the decision.  I'll admit I'm still a bit overwhelmed with things, but I'm learning to trust Him, day by day, each moment at a time.  A song He's got in my heart now by Sidewalk Prophets...

If I saw You on the street / And You said come and follow me / But I had to give up everything / All I once held dear and all of my dreams / Would I love You enough to let go / Or would my love run dry / When You asked for my life.

When did love become unmoving? / When did love become unconsuming? / Forgetting what the world has told me / Father of love, You can have me / You can have me.

If You’re all You claim to be / Then I’m not losing anything / So I will crawl upon my knees / Just to know the joy of suffering / I will love You enough to let go / Lord, I give you my life / I give you my life

......I want to be where You are / I’m running into Your arms / And I will never look back
So Jesus, here is my heart.

Working with people you trust

I just wrapped up a 6-month consulting engagement with a large insurance company as it spun off its global operation, merged and integrated with another global company.  The gig more or less landed in my lap - actually when they asked if I would help, I thought; "no, I didn't quit my corporate job to go right back into corporate."  But as I thought and prayed about it, the project seemed it might be interesting, and there may be opportunity to pursue, or at least learn and leverage that knowledge as I continue to build up my organization.  Here's why.

With any merger and integration, there are people issues.  And where there are people issues is exactly the space I want to play in.  The concept behind EdGE is indeed about people engagement.  Yes, my goal is to get people and companies and schools and groups to engage in socially responsible work and activities, but I believe that in order for that to happen in a meaningful, impactful, and sustainable way, it first requires people to be engaged in what they already do and where they already spend the majority of their time and energy.  People need to see the value they can bring to their organization or company - people need to understand that and derive value from that to drive their motivation in continuing in his or her daily work.  Only when people understand who they are and how they fit into their work or their activities, can people truly build a lasting and mutually meaningful and valuable relationship with the local or global community he or she may desire to impact.

So, did I succeed?  Well, at the end, I did not get to do as much in pushing the CSR agenda - there was just too much uncertainty and cynicism that needed to be allayed first.  I played more of an internal communications strategy role, as we developed frameworks and strategies and tactics to best communicate to our global community of employees who had been on a crazy roller-coaster ride the past couple years with the economy, and who needed some "TLC" through the continued uncertainty.  It was a neat perspective to gain working with a global operation, effectively communicating not only across different personalities, but different cultures and attitudes and global dynamics.  

Despite my inability to push towards CSR, it reminded me of the philosophy behind EdGE.  Pushing CSR at a time when people are uncertain about whether they will have a job in a few months is not effective.  There are levels of comfort that people all need to have before they can participate effectively in anything, whether that be in their family, their job, their activities, or their communities.  You can't push an agenda down someone's throat - you need to address their needs and frame the agenda in a way that does address those needs.  Right now, the 12,000+ employees we were focused on needed their basic needs addressed - they needed to know what was going on with the merger and integration, they needed to know what was changing for them, they needed to know if they would have a job.  Since we didn't know who would have a job or not, we had to focus on getting them relevant information and updates on what was going on in a manner that they would respond to.  So, that's what we did.  Now that the deal is closed, they'll have to focus on tactically executing on the integration plans and bringing together the people from both organizations.  Once people have a better idea of what they are doing, what role they play on their team, how they work with the people they work with, etc., only after that is clear can you successfully get the discussion rolling around CSR.  Let's face it - people are selfish.  People want to know what's in it for them.  So I guess back to my original question on whether I succeeded or not - well, we did what we could, and I think we did a decent job.  I had hoped I'd get more CSR play in, but also went in knowing it might be a hard pitch to sell.  I didn't, but I did learn from the experience, which was part of my personal agenda, and I also had privilege of working with and getting to know some great people... people whom I considered colleagues but now as family.

I couldn't help but feel sad as I was getting ready to leave and say my goodbyes today.  Tears actually welled up a bit - gosh I've really got some separation anxiety issues... but truly these are people who I've come to really love and care for.  They are my friends, my mentors, my family, and I'm sad that I won't see them and interact with them both professionally or personally on a weekly basis.  This was indeed a tiring project, running to NYC weekly, sometimes more than once per week, and also Delaware this past month; but nonetheless I realize over and over again how important the people you surround yourself with that helps you stay engaged and interested through those tiring and frustrating moments.  Sometimes its those same people that you come to love who are causing the frustration, yet still, there is that desire to push through and drive for the success of the team.

I've been so fortunate to have worked with some really great people.  I'll add to my growing family of colleagues and mentors through this experience.  And I remind myself how important it is to work with good people... people who believe in you and trust you.. people who you believe in and who you can trust in as well.

I appreciate what you’re doing!

In the vast underground world of NYC, I was rushing from subway to subway, and saw a lady with a paper bag full of plastic Poland spring water bottles.  It reminded me of my days as the unofficial recycling girl at the large Fortune 500 company that I worked for.  Well, I only did one site, but on a weekly basis there was plenty of recycling and trash to be personally walked to my car, driven to the recycling dumpster at my apartment, and dumped in.

As I watched her from behind, I really wanted to encourage her to keep it up.  It’s a thankless job, and it’s easy to just say, “forget it!  What’s a handful of bottles anyways… " so, well, as I brushed by her I said “hey!  I appreciate what you’re doing! Thank you.”  and then went on my merry way.  It felt good to say that… although there was a side of me that wanted to say: “great job, but why don’t you get yourself a reusable bottle and drink tap.  NYC tap is great,” but I held back, as I myself was holding a plastic bottled drink in my hand.  One step at a time.  We’ve got to celebrate the small things… the small wins.  Change takes time, and she was doing her part.  So, thank you lady!

I know they teach you not to talk to strangers, but, we live in a global community.  And to be a community, you’ve gotta be open to listening, seeing, and talking to others.  So I encourage y’all to go and see, listen, and talk.  I mean, be smart, but treat people with dignity, and my motto... stolen from my past job... assume positive intent first.  I guess it's less relevant a motto for this instance, but perhaps for the homeless man I talked to yesterday.

What's so hard to love?

This evening as I was walking from my brother's apartment to meet my friend, I walked by a homeless man, shirt half off, sitting on top of a grated area, trying to get comfortable.  I wanted to do something for him, but then shamefully walked by him as if he was not there.  It was somewhat of a darker street and less populated, and no food options were around, so I walked right by him.  He didn't even ask for anything.  He did not look good.

As I walked by him, I started to get really mad at myself.  Just stop. Turn around. Go talk to him.  But... I kept going.  Yes, there was a side of me that was wanting to protect myself, but there was also a side of me that was thinking about the inconvenience of it all.  God I am sorry!  So then as I continued to walk, I promised God that the next homeless person I see, I'll get him/her something.  Gosh... forgive me for bargaining with you...

So then I met up with my friend Tomo for a date to Pinkberry.  We walked by a man holding a cup of change.  I stopped Tomo and told her about my promise to God, and that we needed to go and talk to the man.  (in college, Tomo and I would often talk and eat with homeless guys so it actually felt pretty normal).  So we went, offered to buy some food for him, and he said very honestly... "that's nice of you.  How about a juice."  And we prod and ask, "are you sure you don't want a sandwich or pizza or something?"  And he's like, "no... just juice... i just had a slice... but thank you."  And off we went to get him some juice.  The man was so gentle and thankful.  We fist bumped, or as Tomo taught me today, we "dapped" (she teaches high school kids who taught her that), and wished each other well.  Just a normal human being, like me, who's currently got some challenging circumstances.  He is made in the image of God, just like I am. That man was not that hard to love once we started talking.  We need to put down our stigmas and walls, treat humans (no matter how they look, smell, act) like God's precious children, and learn to care for one another and love each other.  Learning to love what seems difficult to love... but if God could love someone like me... then what could possibly be my excuse.

Random Coincidence?

So I think God is trying to speak to me through this Chris Tomlin song.  It seems to be playing everywhere I go.  You know... it's kind of like that Lamb Chops play along song... you know what I'm talking about..."this is the song that never ends, yes, it goes on and on, my friends. some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, and they'll continue singing it forever just because..."  Okay well this song is not quite like that and it's not annoying at all.. I like it a lot... but you get the point... I hope...

So then this evening, as I opened pandora, this song starts playing. As the same exact time (literally), I happened to directed to some random website (not a music or lyrics site) and the lyrics to that song are literally sitting there in front of my face on the website home page.  How crazy is that!  So well, I feel that I should post it on my blog.  As it ministers and teaches me, I hope it does to you as well.

(I took repetitive chorus/bridge sections out to save space...)
Water You turned into wine
Open the eyes of the blind
There’s no one like You
None like You
Into the darkness You shine
Out of the ashes we rise
There’s no one like You
None like You

Into the darkness you shining
Out of the ashes we Rise
There’s no One like You
None like You.

And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
And if Our God is for us, then who can ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against?
Then what can stand against?
Then what can stand against?

Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God…
Our God is greater, our God is stronger
God You are higher than any other
Our God is Healer, awesome in power
Our God, Our God…

Remembering 9/11

9 years have passed.  I can remember the vivid details of the day.  I have not seen too much of it on TV as I haven't been home, but was just on a website and the pics came up... oh man, seeing those pictures brings it all back, very clearly.  It brings chills.  It brings sadness.

I remember the day unfolding in my dorm room in NYC.  I woke up to get ready for my first class of the day...then went to my computer.  My friend IM'd me asking if I had heard about the WTC?  My initial reaction was... uh... you mean like 7-8 years ago?  She said - go and turn the TV on.  Woh - what's going on.  One tower had been struck by a plane.  The smoke was billowing up into the clouds, flames still bright and smoky.  I stood motionless in front of the TV.  My suitemates started walking over. They sat down.  Then all of a sudden another plane comes across and flies into the 2nd building.  At first, I thought they were showing a video replay of the plane hitting the building, but then I quickly realized that now both buildings had been hit and were on fire. Wow. I could not believe.  In my mind I thought, could this really be happening?  What's going on?  It was shocking to see the plane hit the 2nd tower as it happened - that doesn't happen in today's news.  The broadcasters were just as shocked as we were.  I had to go to class but I didn't want to leave the TV. What's going on? I packed up and left for class.

In class, the teacher dismissed anyone who needed to connect with family members who worked in the Towers but asked everyone else to stay.  We acknowledged what happened, and then we attempted to go on with class.  The teacher wanted to keep some semblance of order, of regularity, that us watching the news all day or venturing downtown to the site would not do anyone any good.  I got back to my dorm after class and both Towers were engulfed in flames.  Then suddenly 1 just begins collapsing in on itself.  I was so disturbed... what's going on?  Oh man my heart sunk. How many lives were lost.  What will happen?  Who was in there?  Do I have friends or family in there?  I didn't want to leave the TV, but I had to get to my next class - they weren't canceling them.  Afterward as I walked back to my dorm, you could see the smoke clouds billowing high above in the sky.  People were staring at the sky.  People were chattering.  People were scared.  People were dazed.  I came back to the TV and the 2nd tower was gone too.  So surreal...All the phone lines are axed or busy so I can't call my parents.  I send my mom an IM to let her know we're fine. Thank God for IM... it was our means of communicating both on campus with our peers as well as with family whereever they may be.  I am utterly shocked.  I can't believe what I'm seeing.  The two towers... an iconic symbol of NYC... was gone.  More importantly, the people who didn't make it out.  God what is going on.

Growing up in central Jersey, friends' parents worked in those buildings. Did they make it out okay?  I thought, it could have easily been me or my family in those towers. I had recently just sung there with my gospel choir at the amex building at 3 World Financial Center right next door... I was frequently in office buildings throughout NYC interning or interviewing for internships.. we just visited the Towers a few months earlier on a family NYC trip. We have several snapshots looking up at the towers - one that was just taken months earlier.  It was scary to think about that...all we could do was sit there, in front of the tv and watch as the tragedy evolved, from NYC to DC to PA.  I would find out later that the man who helped take down the terrorists and the plane in PA lived in the neighborhood behind mine and attended a church that we sometimes visited.. leaving behind a young beautiful family.  Recent Columbia grads who worked in those Towers didn't make it. But there were also plenty of stories of survivors - people who made it out and had to walk to NJ to get home or who for whatever reason were not yet in the office or did not go that day.  We were thankful they made it... but they all had stories of others who did not.

We all felt so helpless - we all wanted to do something to help, but what could we do?  There was a public call for blood donations to local blood banks.  As we headed to the hospital, we were told by others that they didn't need anymore blood.  I'll spare the details why.  They announced that they were closing all the bridges and tunnels going in and out of NYC.  We half joked... great... we're stranded on this island...

The next day we woke up to a smoky sky with a burning smell in the air.  Classes were still on.  We talked about it.  We discussed it.  We debated it.  Interfaith prayer vigils were scheduled.  Tents went up where donations of food and clothing articles popped up.  A memorial was held on campus for CU alumni who perished - so many grads, some old, some young... some that had just graduated months earlier.

At the time, I was working with a couple of youth-led / youth empowerment organizations. The UN General Assembly was having a Special Session on Children later that month that I was supposed to report on as a youth correspondent.  That was postponed due to 9/11 but we knew we needed to pull together a global youth response to what just happened.  A video conference meeting with youths from around the world was quickly thrown together where we shared openly about our reactions and feelings on what had just happened.  Feelings of sadness and real anger (harsh virtual punches) came out on that call, but we, a group of teenagers and slightly older, were able to work through that in a relatively mature manner as we listened to each other and put ourselves in each others' shoes. I thought... if only the global leaders could have conversations like this and learn to listen to each other and work together... what would our world look like?  (I'm happy to see that this is starting to happen and I'm praying that the recent Middle East talks move in a positive way... I am a nerd... I rushed home from NYC one day so that I could watch the live news briefing of Pres Obama and Middle East leaders...).  Friends and family were telling us not to use the subways because of potential terrorist threats, but it's hard to live in NYC and avoid the subways.  I remember taking the 7 train to soccer games and staring at the gaping hole in the NYC skyline. I remember hearing sirens (a common occurrence in NYC before 9/11) and fighter planes in the sky, holding my breath hoping everything would be alright.  I wanted to flee NYC.  I left that spring to study abroad in China... where news is so filtered that everything sounds wonderful and the world seems to have no problems (okay, an extreme statement but you get the point...).

I had written an article in 2001 for another org's blog.  I was reminded of it today and just posted it on my blog: http://tamstergk1.blogspot.com/search?updated-min=2001-01-01T00:00:00-05:00&updated-max=2002-01-01T00:00:00-05:00&max-results=1.  Got some negative reactions and positive encouragement in response to that article in '01, but it's what was on my mind then...

Anyhow on this anniversary of 9/11, I want to honor those that lost their lives that day. The day will never be forgotten. Your lives will never be forgotten.  

Separation Anxiety, Learning is Hard, Marriage!

So it's been a bit over a month since India, and it's been a time full of joy and excitement; frustrating, stress-ridden, not-at-peace moments; living and learning, and sadness and homesickness.

Why sadness and homesickness?
My parents left for China last week... my dad took a short job opp there, and less than one week after returning from my brother's wedding, they were off to China.  I'm super excited for them. I think it will be a fun, new, and fresh opportunity.  I hope and pray it stretches them outside of their comfort zone, which I think they (and myself as well) are too comfortable.  It's funny hearing them talk to their friends about having culture shock, given that they are real legit Chinese after all, but it's a reality.  China is a whole new ball park.  They grew up in Taiwan which is very different from mainland China, and even if they were in Taiwan now they'd have culture shock especially with them having been in the US for 30-40 years or so.  Anyhow, sad and homesickness... well, I am the baby of the house, and I guess I never quite outgrew being a baby. As a 3-4 year old, my dad had to sit through a full year of saturday morning Chinese school - yeah, I was young for the class, but regardless, one's parent should not have to sit through a full year of school.  Then whenever I started a new school, I'd cry my eyes out... this proceeded to continue... girl scout camping trip, summer sleepover camps (that I would beg my parents to let me go to), when my brother left for college and i had to stay by myself at a friend's house, in HS my summer at Brown U (cried the whole car ride up even though I was the one who wanted to go), college moving in (i was a disaster), when my parents left after visiting me during my study abroad program, moving to hartford for work (secretly after they left), and well... now... as they were leaving and dropping them off at the airport...  the tears started flowing, the lips pouted and the words "don't leave me".. "i don't want you go to"... came out.  gosh what is wrong with me..  i realize i'm ridiculous but it's just so out of my control.  i try to hide it for however long i can but at some point it just can't hold itself in anymore.  so annoying!  i really am excited for them, but clearly the tears just don't tell that story.  anyhow, it's sad not having them here, although we skype/gchat every day so i suppose it's not too different.

Why frustrating, stress-ridden, not-at-peace moments... living and learning...?
After my return from India, I've just been running around all over the place, from NY for work stuff, to Vancouver for my brother's wedding, to NJ to help wrap things up with my parents, to Philly where my life is... anyhow, the list of things to do was getting longer and longer, and I was still trying to process my experience in India.  I miss India dearly. I miss the people... my family in India... I miss the children... I miss them all.  It was indeed an amazing experience, but it was also difficult.  God is still teaching me.. about India... about His heart for the poor... about leadership... about relationships... about love... about me.  It's hard to learn... it's hard to discern truth... it's easy to say "whatever, so be it" and hard to say "grow me, teach me." At points I felt broken... I didn't know why I felt certain ways... I didn't know how to make the feelings go away... I didn't know how to make it all better.  I wanted to give up - strangely that is the easier route in a worldly sense.  But He's assured me that He is at work and has brought me to this place to teach me who He is. He's filling me back up with His joy again.  He's reminding me of His love and His sacrifice for me.  I felt like I was choking, but I'm learning again what freedom means, and what it meant to live in His freedom.  What peace and joy there is in that... despite all the stuff life on this earth entails... there is true freedom.

Why time of joy and excitement?

The bride & groom's siblings MC team 

My brother got married!  Yay!  Finally!  hehe... The wedding was in Vancouver, where my sister-in-law is from.  Lots of stuff to take care but I was happy to to support them... building the slideshow (and putting a date wrong in the slides... literally finishing it up the day of wedding!), helping with whatever, and MC'ing the reception.  Her bro and I MC'ed in English, Cantonese, and Mandarin.  I must say that we were a hit!!!  although not intentionally... simply because our Chinese is not so good... people were laughing... at our expense.  but it was really fun nonetheless.  So for example, we were telling folks that if they had not picked up their name card/seating assignment, to go pick up their card outside... well in my broken chinese i said: "if you haven't picked up your BUSINESS card, go outside".  no please, no thank you, just go outside.  :)   Anyways...lots of other entertaining remarks, again, by accident... (my dad described that there were lots of ups and downs and i translated that literally and directly from chinese into english... "there were up up down down").  Besides the ET factor, it was a really fun time seeing old friends and family (including my dad's awesome elementary school teacher who is just... amazing... I'll share about her another time because it warrants a full post on her alone), and getting to know more of my sis-in-law's family.... and seeing her two cute adorable dogs as well.  Super cute!  Vancouver is an awesome city too. Some of my brother's old HS friends who I hadn't seen since I was in middle school/HS was so surprised to see me all made up in a dress... the image of me frozen in her mind is that of a kid/teenager in soccer shorts and a t-shirt.  I guess things haven't changed that much... I still opt for that, but my mother would have hurt me if I showed up in that at my bro's wedding.  Anyhow twas lots of fun.

Alright, that's the quick, but lengthy update.

Attempt at Web Chatting...in Chinese.

My parents are headed to China and had some questions re: luggage limitations and such, and well, the design of the airline's website is pretty bad... no way to find the answer, so we decide to try the web chat option...  it's really not all that funny... but we found it entertainingly annoying. I'm happy that I still remember some Chinese from college (the rents had to help some...)... although it didn't quite help all that much anyways. My questions are in purple bold... their responses in blue. I took out some of the larger grids that they included in their response...

虚拟客服 08-30 00:50：亲爱的wang，中国南方航空欢迎您！请问有什么可以帮到您？
wang 08-30 00:50：what is the domestic flight luggage weight limit?
虚拟客服 08-30 00:50：很抱歉，虚拟客服暂还不能识别您的问题！您是要咨询“机票预订、酒店预订、度假预订、机票变更、机票退票、机票验真、办登机牌、行李查询、促销活动、明珠会员、投诉”的任一问题类型吗？建议您输入对应的问题类型进行查询；或者点击南航网站的“在线客服”链接，等待客服人员为您解答，谢谢！
wang 08-30 00:51：can i write in english?
虚拟客服 08-30 00:51：很抱歉，虚拟客服暂还不能识别您的问题！您是要咨询“机票预订、酒店预订、度假预订、机票变更、机票退票、机票验真、办登机牌、行李查询、促销活动、明珠会员、投诉”的任一问题类型吗？建议您输入对应的问题类型进行查询；或者点击南航网站的“在线客服”链接，等待客服人员为您解答，谢谢！
wang 08-30 00:52：wei shen me ni bu neng cha xing li de wen ti?
虚拟客服 08-30 00:52：很抱歉，虚拟客服暂还不能识别您的问题！您是要咨询“机票预订、酒店预订、度假预订、机票变更、机票退票、机票验真、办登机牌、行李查询、促销活动、明珠会员、投诉”的任一问题类型吗？建议您输入对应的问题类型进行查询；或者点击南航网站的“在线客服”链接，等待客服人员为您解答，谢谢！
wang 08-30 00:55：国内的行李超重费用是什么？
虚拟客服 08-30 00:55：收取超重行李费，南航会为您填开超重行李票。超重行李费率为每公斤按超重行李票填开当日所适用的经济舱票价的 1.5%计算，以人民币元为单位，尾数四舍五入. 美加航线超额行李收费标准：/ 中国-欧洲航线超额行李收费标准：
wang 08-30 00:57：我需要中国国内行李费用。
虚拟客服 08-30 00:57：1.旅客免费随身携带行李：持头等舱客票的旅客，每人可携带两件；持公务舱或经济舱客票的旅客，每人只能携带一件。上述每件物品的体积不得超过20x40x55厘米，总重量不得超过5公斤。/ 2.免费托运的行李限额：（1）一般航线持成人票或儿童票的旅客，每人托运行李免费额为：头等舱40公斤，公务舱30公斤，经济舱20公斤。
按全票价10%购票的婴儿旅客托运行李免费额为10公斤。/ （2）中美、中加航线采用计件行李规定，经济舱免费行李额2件，每件不超过23KG（50磅），且每件三边之和不超过158CM（62英寸）。/ 3.行李超重的收费：对于超标的托运行李，南航会收取超重行李费，并为您填开超重行李票。/ 超重行李费率为每公斤按超重行李票填开当日所适用的经济舱票价的 1.5%计算，以人民币元为单位，尾数四舍五入。（美加航线超额行李收费按另行标准）
wang 08-30 01:03：如果我的行李是25公斤，请问超重费用是多少？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:03：收取超重行李费，南航会为您填开超重行李票。超重行李费率为每公斤按超重行李票填开当日所适用的经济舱票价的 1.5%计算，以人民币元为单位，尾数四舍五入。
美加航线超额行李收费标准：/ 中国-欧洲航线超额行李收费标准：
wang 08-30 01:10：我有Economy 中国国内机位。 请问第二件行李多少线？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:10：通过南航预订了酒店后，没有入住时，被称为NO SHOW。如果在酒店登记的实际入住人姓名和预订时的不一样，也可能会被认为NO SHOW。当出行计划有变，需要取消预订或者更改预订，请提前通知南航即可避免NO SHOW。
wang 08-30 01:12：你好奇怪。 你为什么听不懂我的问题？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:12：很抱歉，虚拟客服暂还不能识别您的问题！您是要咨询“机票预订、酒店预订、度假预订、机票变更、机票退票、机票验真、办登机牌、行李查询、促销活动、明珠会员、投诉”的任一问题类型吗？建议您输入对应的问题类型进行查询；或者点击南航网站的“在线客服”链接，等待客服人员为您解答，谢谢！
wang 08-30 01:15：超过一件免费行李要付多少钱？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:15：打印行程单不收费。如果您需要报销凭证，请在航班起飞当天（航班起飞时刻前）到机场的南航电子商务柜台索取电子客票行程单即可用于报销。
wang 08-30 01:22：从上海到郑州。有两件交寄行李。第一件行李是免费。请问第二件行李需要付多少钱？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:22：免费随身携带的手提行李：持头等舱客票的旅客，每人可携带两件；持公务舱或经济舱客票的旅客，每人只能携带一件。上述每件物品的体积不得超过20x40x55厘米，总重量不得超过5公斤。
wang 08-30 01:24：你的中文有问题。
虚拟客服 08-30 01:24：答案
wang 08-30 01:30：哎呀。酸了。你浪费我的时间。 我不要跟你讲话了。给我别人的电话好吗。请你选比你聪明多的人。
虚拟客服 08-30 01:30：“值机”即“办理登机手续”，是指：您购票成功后，凭有效证件在机场出发大厅办理乘机手续，领取登机牌以确认您的机上座位。/ 1、登机手续的办理可通过机场柜台或自助值机设备办理、网上办登机牌、短信办登机牌。/ 2、各种方式对应的办理时间要求也不相同：/（1）机场办理时间要求：不同的航线和机场停办登机手续的时间不同，一般是在飞机起飞前30分钟，部分机场为45分钟或一个小时。所以建议您在旅行前，查阅好相关信息，预留充分的时间办理登机手续。如有疑问，可咨询始发当地机场。/（2）网上、短信办理：网上、短信办登机牌可在航班预计起飞时间前一天的14点至航班预计起飞前1小时办理（部分城市可提前办理）。如您采用此种方式办理登机手续，请确保您的城市已开通此功能、并在相应时间段内。详情请进入 http://airport.csair.com/cki/app 查看。
wang 08-30 01:36：经济舱第二件大件行李收费多少？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:36：南航网上订票系统票价限制条件如下：/ 标签名称 旅客使用条件： 销售时间段/ 头等舱；免费变更、退票；航班起飞前 / 公务舱；免费变更、退票；航班起飞前 / 商务行；免费变更、退票收取5%的退票费；航班起飞前 / 旅行家；变更收取10%的变更费，退票收取20%的退票费；航班起飞前 / 快乐飞；购买后不得变更，退票；航班起飞一天前
wang 08-30 01:39：经济舱交运第二件行李收费多少？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:39：南航网上订票系统票价限制条件如下：标签名称 旅客使用条件： 销售时间段 / 头等舱；免费变更、退票；航班起飞前 / 公务舱；免费变更、退票；航班起飞前
商务行；免费变更、退票收取5%的退票费；航班起飞前 / 旅行家；变更收取10%的变更费，退票收取20%的退票费；航班起飞前 / 快乐飞；购买后不得变更，退票；航班起飞一天前
wang 08-30 01:40：你还在吗？
虚拟客服 08-30 01:40：恩？干吗…来个我擅长的话题吧，比方说：买机票？查里程？办登机牌？要不就说特价促销行不行？
wang 08-30 01:44：我的妈妈说： forget it. 真是的。你得用功多努力学系。你需要很多帮忙。 难道一位外国人的中文比你的好。丢面子吧。再见。
虚拟客服 08-30 01:44：答案
wang 08-30 01:49：谢谢。不好意思打扰你的时间。
虚拟客服 08-30 01:49：不客气！感谢您的咨询，南航祝您生活愉快！

Supporting EMC

So I've gotten some emails re: how to support EMC and the work they are doing. Beyond the Horizons is a nonprofit that was set up a few years ago to support their programs, more specifically their school but also other projects that EMC has. Kris, the current school administrator of the Emmanuel School is from Maryland, and I believe his friends had helped set this nonprofit up so that folks like us can support the children that are part of their programs. Kris is Aunty Premila's son-in-law, husband of Kavi (who I believe was mentioned in the blog). So the two of them and their precious and beautiful little girl moved to Calcutta after the passing of their father, the founder of EMC and Calcutta Samaritans, to be part of EMC's work. Indeed an amazing family! The website for that is: http://www.beyondthehorizon.us/Home.asp

You can also support the microfinance work that EMC is providing to their communities. Prana International was set up by Amit and Jill who live in the Philadelphia area. They are the ones who introduced me to EMC 2 years ago right before my first trip to India. Amit grew up in Calcutta and is very familiar with EMC as he grew up with folks from EMC and served there as well.

You can read up on Prana and more on the microfinance work being done with EMC, and support them financially as well here: http://www.pranainternational.org/support.html

If any problems, just let me know and I can reach out to the appropriate folks. THANKS!

Calcutta Day 13/14 - August 9/10 2010

We had a long layover in Dubai.  We took a four hour city tour which was nice.  We also met a man from Saudi Arabia and had a nice conversation with him over lunch about everything from social justice issues to investment banking and finance, to burying people upon their death, to the meaning - or rather, the meaninglessness of life, to our past President Mr. Bush, and to racial profiling.

Grace feeding the (stuffed)
camel at Dubai Museum

Tammy kissing the (stuffed) camel

On the flight back from Dubai to JFK, I was watching a documentary by Madonna "I Am Because We Are", which shares about the lives of the many orphaned children in Malawi due to the AIDS pandemic.  Anyhow, I loved how the movie described the interconnectedness of us all, as a global community.  As I was listening to the narration, I felt like it was speaking the thoughts in my mind and heart, so I scribbled them down quickly and am sharing them here.

I AM BECAUSE WE ARE:

• it's about seeing the world as one unified whole. It’s an understanding of the interconnectedness between every one of us. And there’s no difference b/w the children of Malawi, Phillipines, of... (not enough time to capture the countries mentioned but you get the point).  We are all children of the world and we are all responsible for them.  
• It makes a seed of sillyness of anyone who thinks they are better or separate than another. 
• When you dehumanize the other, inexorably you are dehumanized.  You need the other person to be all they can be in order for you to be all you can be.  And when you do think that way, the things we can solve together are beyond imagine. 
• And that way these problems become our problems, and the solutions involve all of us in the issue.
• What we have in common is more important than our differences.
• There are ways for each of us to contribute.  You need to find your own way.  Understand how interconnected we are. 
• We live in a world where we have choice.  The choices spin out of control...for the world together that solves problems and finds a path to peace.
• It will take courage and resilience
• Take great comfort in knowing that people are the same everywhere. We all bleed the same color.  We all want to look after our children. And we all want to love and be loved.

See y'all in America!

Calcutta Day 12 - August 8, 2010

Rob left us last night.  Grace and I were pretty sad.  We truly have become a tight team in our short time working together.  We are so thankful for that.

Today is Grace and my last full day.  Our flight leaves first thing in the morning tomorrow (Monday).  We had the privilege of joining our friends and family at church again.  Once again, all we had to do was wake-up and walk downstairs.  How convenient.

During the worship, Shajan slipped me a note asking me to say "something" to the congregation.  Uhh...  something about...  we've been asked to say stuff on the fly a lot the past couple weeks but this was in front of an entire congregation, some of whom had no idea what we were doing and such. Nonetheless, whatever I said I cannot recall, but it really is easy in some sense to get up and say something because EMC truly has blessed us in allowing us to work with them.  Everyone we met was and continues to be an inspiration.  We will really miss them.

After church, Shajan and Aunty Premila and family invited us out to lunch.  Truly a treat for us!  It was fun meeting their families and getting to know them more intimately.  

Grace and I then ventured back via metro to attempt some shopping.  We didn't have time this trip to get small gifts and such for friends and family so we were hoping we'd be able to get a little something.  I love the people of Calcutta.  They are so eager to go out of the way to help.  Granted, we never succeed in locating where we are attempting to based on the help of the kind people, but the extra effort they go to to help us is so appreciated.

We met up with Kavi, Aunty Premila's daughter for tea/coffee at night by the Y.  It was great to get to know her more as well.  Afterwards, we offered to take some things back to the US for her, so we went back to their home to grab it.  I felt kind of bad popping in so late.  But again, another treat being able to spend more time with Kavi and Aunty Premila.  Aunty Premila is learning Bengali so we came in as she was completing her Bengali homework!  I don't know why, but it was inspiring for me to see this amazing woman who does so much running an organization that touches so many lives... for her to make the time to study was really inspiring.  Hopefully next time I go to India, I'll also have some Bengali down and we can have a conversation in Bengali!  I just need a Bengali teacher now - let me know if you know anyone who can teach me!  

Someone we did not get to meet in person this trip, and someone we will not meet until we get called to Heaven is Mr. Pavamani - Aunty Premila's late husband, Kavi's father, the founder of EMC, the mentor and inspiration of so many people that we met working with EMC these past couple weeks, and the heart and soul of EMC that continues despite his physical presence not being there.  Despite not having met him in person, we truly feel we did actually meet him.  His spirit lives in in the lives and of the projects of EMC.  We heard so much about him and saw so much of him through the people we met, people who's lives have completely changed as a result of his encouragement and support.  I feel him and his spirit already even though I've never met him in person.  God had greater plans for Him, and I know that one day I'll get to meet this wonderful man, a true servant that loved and lived the gospel.  

Sad to leave our friends and family in Calcutta but I know I'll be back soon.

Calcutta Day 11 - August 7, 2010

Our time in Calcutta is quickly winding down.  We went to Flury’s again for breakfast, and then trekked successfully via metro to Freeset, another amazing organization that is helping women gain “freedom” at many levels from one of the largest red light districts of Calcutta.  I was excited to see Kerry and Annie who started this organization years ago, moving their young family from New Zealand to the red light district of Calcutta.  It was great to see some of the same women who were there 2 years ago and continue to work at Freeset, and not back in the sex trade.  It is always such a pleasure to meet these beautiful women who have experienced or are working towards full “freedom” and seeing the joy in their faces.  Mina, one of the ladies I had met upon the last visit, a beautiful woman who was one of the first women to come and work for Freeset years ago, someone who has grown to be a leader of this organization - a true inspiration to all, and as Kerry and Annie shared - is the visionary driving Freeset -- I had the privilege of seeing her at the office again.  She sternly looked Grace, Rob, and I straight in the eyes telling us to share about Freeset and the work they are doing.  The economy has hit them as well, as there are less buyers of their bags and tshirts.  Less purchasers means less work needs to be done, and therefore less work for the women to do, and less income for them.  They've had to decrease hours that the women work, close shop on certain days since no work was coming in.  Pray that business would come.  Share Freeset with others you know.  If you need to order tshirts or bags and such, especially for groups or conferences, please consider Freeset.  Mina has set the goal - freedom for 10,000 girls from the red light district of Calcutta.  She is the visionary.  We need to help her and Freeset achieve that.  

 

Riding the metro back was quite an exciting time.  Poor Rob was surrounded, up close and personal with several other Indian men, with his face stuck a centimeter or two from a man's armpit.  I couldn't stop laughing.  Sorry Rob... sometimes all you can do is laugh.  :)

Then, poor Rob got stuck waiting for Grace and I as we got our eyebrows threaded.  The sign outside said "Ladies Only".  Poor Rob.

Calcutta Day 10 - August 6, 2010

Today we visited the Emmanuel School, a school offering the highest level of education in India for the poorest of the poor.  See my post from 2008 to learn more: http://tamstergk1.blogspot.com/2008/12/day-6-calcutta-samaritans-emmanuel.html. (Actually I just looked at that post and there is not all that much there but something).  We did not have formal observation sessions and work, but we wanted to visit the school to help round out our experience in looking at EMC’s various educational programs.  We had already interacted with several of the students outside of the classroom so it was neat to see them in their uniforms in the classroom.  It’s amazing how much a uniform erases social boundaries.  You almost forget what these kids go through every day in their lives outside of school when they are on school grounds and in the classrooms, wearing uniforms and socializing with their peers.  Some of these kids go home to a small room where 8 or so family members reside, studying under a blanket using a candle as light.

I had bingo card/"chips" duty.

After school we participated in Javeen Jyoti’s Youth Fellowship.  That was a lot of fun.  Reminded me of the good ole youth group days.  Teenagers are all the same wherever you go.  Different backgrounds, different circumstances, but teens are teens.

During the day we stepped out to visit Connexions, EMC’s program that is supporting families in the slums by creating jobs for women to sew, stitch, craft, create blankets, bags, clothing out of recycled Saris, and cards as well.  It was neat to see the work that is going on there to empower these women in the slums.

At the end of the day we rushed back to the office to try to grab some time with EMC’s leadership, who I’m sure I’ve talked about before – just amazing people who are so gifted and on a daily basis pour out their love and energy to the many people they serve through their ministries.  A brief unscheduled on-site wrap up ended up running much longer than anticipated, but I’m happy we had the opportunity to share in greater detail the work we’ve been doing, and highlight some of our early thoughts and ideas. Their eagerness and affirmation was encouraging, and I pray and hope that we will be able to do a good job providing realistically implementable ideas and suggestions that empower the teachers and staff to do their work more effectively, beyond the wonderful job they are already doing to change and impact lives and communities.  We have quite a bit of homework to do but we are excited that they too are excited.